If you have experienced confusing things in the church you attend you are not alone. There is a growing trend in America especially terrifying in its scope. Our response initially is to ignore it and pass it off as perhaps something we are doing wrong, contrary to God’s intended behavior for us to follow. Then it gets worse to the point we can no longer ignore it. It is at this point we need to look closer at what is really going on, and then look at this whole church situation in a different light. Spiritual truth presented to us by the church tells us how to see things. Through them supposedly is what God is telling us to see. However, when what they say we are to see no longer agrees with what we are really seeing then something must change.
In its correct form the church is an organization of believers where the church management teaches and nurtures the congregation. All members support and nurture each other in whatever relationships develop based on whatever they have in common like similar stations in life, etc. In this case church here refers to the organization, not the true meaning which is the believers themselves. However there has been a big shift from humble servitude by the church managements before to power and control authoritarian posture over its needful and less insightful congregation today. Most churches sadly are no longer about proclaiming and demonstrating by example Christ’s teachings, but now are about promotion of their organization.
This in turn attracts personalities that are social climbers and backstabbers whose only intent is political and social power for themselves. Their behaviors are pathetically lacking in character, and very divisive to the congregation, which is probably where you fit into the picture. No longer are most churches about nurturing and healing, they are more about competitive arenas where each section, family or group within the organization all try to out-righteous each other. Polish, sophistication, and nuanced deep understanding of scripture are required social currencies. Having a perfect background, and academic accomplishments are also mandatory. Most churches, sadly enough anymore cherry pick their congregations and cull out the misfits because they are not worthy of Christ’s fellowship. Most churches are now nothing more than social clubs of good-old-boy networks and righteous two-faced backstabbers.
Needful people seek out church fellowship not only for gaining a religious foundation in their lives, but also for emotional support for the obstacles their daily life possesses. Traditional religious template is you embrace a principle, then attach a personality to it, worship the personality and somehow the principle is invoked into you by your worship of the personality. Sounds good on paper, but rarely works and is rarely followed. Learning about biblical history has nothing to do with facing the problems we all need help overcoming today and being an example for our kids to follow. The needs we have are for support, guidance from compassionate others, and help logistically from those who can help. We have historically always looked to some religious organization to do this. Sadly, their degrading nature has turned them into a social club for the elite in most cases. It is no longer about the message; it is about the messenger and the status we seek from influential persons within it.
What is rarely acquired in the religious template of embracing the personality, in this case Jesus Christ, is character. Character is the ingredient we all seek in joining a church group, and what we need much of in the hearts of those around us. We parents want to see character demonstrated in all the interactions we have with fellow adults at church, and we want out children to see it as well. Character is the glue that builds integrity into Humankind in our community and daily life social transactions. Persons with high character bring out other sub-character attributes we are seeking: They are love, compassion, understanding, sympathy in listening as we share our hurts and victories, and the willingness to pay attention as we share ourselves with them.
When we encounter church abuse and they take advantage of us, ignore us, malign us for betrayal of their doctrine or refusal to condemn another person, then it is time to leave. They may be a perfect biblical, religious organization, doctrinal correct where you are, but if they show no character and do not deeply honor you as a unique individual, then it is time to move on. God cannot lead you to a good social well of character until you leave the dry well where you are at now. It could have started out as a source of character and virtue years ago, but seasons change and so do churches. Do not try to change them. They are good at cutting others down and surviving and they will do the same to you. They are all poisoners.
The lesson to learn from this is some things about you and your family: You are a unique individual, firstly like every other person on earth in being human, but secondly also different from every other person as well. Poisoning churches will try to suppress you from seeing yourself as a different person, seeing things through your own eyes, and try to make you like them, seeing things through their church eyes, not your own. The truth is being your unique self is always right because that is the way God made you, and He wants you to stay that way. Low character churches will try to mold you. Every bad event and relationship in a controlling church will arise from this spiritual disagreement. They want you to mold to them, and you want and need others to see and respect your uniqueness, and support and nurture you for being so. It is time to leave and seek a congregation whose interactions are based solely on character and all the sub-character attributes of it. Make the choice to leave and take your family with you, and God will help you find your promised land, and He will guide you through your heart, when you put your trust in Him through your heart.
Just for the record, this is an emotional and spiritual encouragement ministry. We are selling nothing here and are not at the present time even set up to take donations, and probably never will. Your healed life are our reward enough, and we are very pleased with that. If you want to, please share your strength with others in your future so our nurturing can live on.